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Live, Laugh, Love Again: A Christian Woman’s Survival Guide to Divorce

Live, Laugh, Love Again: A Christian Woman’s Survival Guide to Divorce

At long last, a Girlfriend+s Guide for the divorced set-written by four women who have experienced it all and have good news about getting through it.Divorce is plaguing our country, which has the highest divorce rate in the world. As many women are now forced to -go it alone+-struggling with what happened, wounded in spirit, trying to rebuild what+s left-four women are determined to make the journey with them! With down-to-earth truth, sensitivity, and humor, this book features real-life storie

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When the Vow Breaks: A Survival and Recovery Guide for Christians Facing Divorce

When the Vow Breaks: A Survival and Recovery Guide for Christians Facing Divorce

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Now an official resource of the nationwide DivorceCare ministry, this new edition of When the Vow Breaks offers practical advice to Christians regarding the top five felt needs and issues that result from facing divorce: kids, finances, anger, depression, and loneliness.   In this sensitive and thorough guide, author/attorney Joseph Warren Kniskern recounts the emotions of his own failed marriage and shares a comprehensive study on what the Bible says about marriage and divorce. More important,

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Christian Divorce. What to Do When it Happens to You

Just in case you were thinking I can’t relate to what you are going through there was a two and a half year period in my life where I went through a Christian divorce. During that time I lost 85% of everything I owned , was denied access to my kids, cried for at least an hour everyday, was kicked aside by my church, was falsely accused, lost my job, was dragged through the courts, paid out unjust amounts of money, almost went bankrupt, and seriously pondered suicide daily with detailed plans of how I was going to do it.

That was many years ago and I wouldn’t want to come across like I am still bitter or looking for some sort of revenge. God has restored me marvelously and I hope to encourage those of you out there who may be in the middle of this dark emotional hellish roller coaster at the moment. There is definitely hope for you. Jesus for sure is right in the middle of all this with you. He hasn’t left you or condemned you like the church probably has painting you with the divorce brush. So I will attempt to share some of the life lessons and things I discovered about Jesus through it all in the hope that you will find sound counsel and comfort.

#1) Jesus is not asking you to now be single for the rest of your life because of your divorce. Jesus knew exactly how long your marriage would last and what you would do when you were in it and what your spouse would do…etc. It is baffling how confused some believers are on this issue. When God created Adam he said” it is not good for man to be alone”. He has provided abundant life for you and given you all things you will need to be Godly. This includes a good mate in life. The only people who are called to be single are quite comfortable with the idea. If you are not comfortable with the thought of being single then you are not called to be single so don’t start entertaining that thought and tormenting yourself with it.

#2) You are not required to hold out forever and pray that your spouse one day snaps out of it. What you will come to find out is God gives us all a free will in all matters (especially marriage) and watch out for well meaning Christians who counsel you to keep praying and believing when God is asking you to move on with your life. Having said that there will be some of you who are apart from your spouse for reasons other than adultery and there is a reasonable chance of reconciling. Perhaps neither of you have done things too damaging to your relationship. To you I say stay in prayer and hold out for a season. How long a season is up to you and God but you are under no condemnation if you move on. Forgiving your spouse is one thing and ever being intimate again with that person is another. There are certain boundaries a spouse can cross and only you can decide if reconciling is reasonable or possible. A relationship is a two way thing (not just one) and both parties have to want to change. If your spouse is demanding change in you and is blind to his or her own arrogance and faults there is no foundation for a healthy reconciliation.

3) Get yourself into some sort of Christian divorce support group outside of your church. Once you find one you will discover that many people’s stories are way uglier than yours and you are not the only one going through this. Whatever you do get out of your house where you are trapped in your own self pity. Brooding by yourself is fruitless. There are natural phases we all experience in divorce and separation it will bring healing to you to understand where you are on the scale by talking to others. Purpose in your heart not to do any Christian dating at this time. Why you ask? Because who you are and why you split with your spouse are all tied into the spirits you have been listening to up to this point in your life and most of them are not good. You may have many patterns of behavior that God wants to change before you are ready again. This is a time for deep introspection on what you may have done wrong and how you can change. I have seen it over and over again where people jump out of their marriage right into the same kind of crap they just got out of. You need time to let the holy spirit change you from within. This doesn’t necessarily mean you were to blame or anything like that it just means God is transforming areas in your life that will take time to emerge in you. How long? I don’t know but it will take care of itself. Begin to thank God out loud and in your heart for your new spouse and the changes he is making in you.

So once again grab hold of hope in your heart. Be on the look out for a good friend of the opposite sex. Why? Because the little fox I am now married to was my best friend during that awful time. The Lord had her right there in front of me but I had to do some changing before I was ready. The key to success is to realize God is for you in this time of hardship and he has a great plan B seeing how plan A didn’t pan out.

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Christian Divorce Advice-Getting The Best Christian Divorce Advice

Christian divorce advice will vary from one therapist to another. If the therapist is well versed in scripture, then it will be well referenced. Let’s face it, there are common struggles unique to every faith, and a good Christian counselor must address them.

1.  Christian Divorce Advice-Where do we start.

The first thing you must realize when getting Christian divorce advice is that you have a big edge versus conventional methods. If both partners are Christian, and believe in “Christ” and his teachings, you both have a common “North Star” for guidance. Christian divorce advice starts with and pretty much ends with “Christ”, and both of you focusing on him and his beliefs (i.e. forgiveness, respect, love, kindness, non-judgmental, etc). This becomes a starting point.

2. Christian Divorce Advice-Can a Christian really divorce?

Sure they can, and unfortunately research is showing us that Christians are at a “higher” percentage then other faiths when it comes to divorcing. What this does tell us though, is that many Christian’s aren’t truly familiar with their faith, and what foundations it rests on. Christian divorce advice must include couples regaining their faith by reading the bible together, and focusing on the teachings of Christ.

3.  Christian Divorce Advice-Why shouldn’t we just call it quits?

There is one word that comes to mind, “commitment” Many good Christian couples today throw in the towel too easily. Well, if I’m not happy, then why not? Happiness in a relationship comes in cycles, and couples must realize this. It is sort of like the tide. It ebbs to a low, and rises to a high. Sticking it out through difficult times will not only strengthen your relationship, but bring you both closer together. Christian Divorce Advice-don’t throw in the towel so fast.

4. Christian Divorce Advice-Is there really an answer?

Yes there is, and with “Christ” interceding you both have a better chance then non-believers. Try praying together. The old saying, “the couple that pray’s together stays together” still olds true today.  Hold hands and say something like, “Dear Lord, we need some help here, we don’t want this marriage to fail, it was built on love, and will heal with love, please stand by us and guide us through this difficult time.” Christian divorce advice will take some effort on both of your parts.

Now act on it. Here’s some advice. There’s an old strategy that has actually worked in getting people back together. Act “as if”. What I mean is, even if you “feel” (ouch, an emotion) that you aren’t in love, act “as if” you were. If you are a man, buy her some flowers, candy or just talk and communicate on “life issues.” If you’re a woman, then tell your man how you appreciate him for everything, (men love appreciation). Sometimes, acting “as if” you were in love, will actually bring you back “in love” Christian Divorce Advice-Act “as if”. You might have to force it, but do it!

Conclusion-Christian Divorce Advice

Getting your marriage back on track is your ultimate goal. Can a marriage be saved after so much damage has been done? Sure, but it will take some time and effort. Christian divorce advice is not only focused on marital problem solving, but incorporating “Christ” back into your lives as your compass who will guide you both when life turns hard.

If you are looking for some solid, God centered Christian divorce advice, then:   Please Visit Here: Christian Divorce Advice

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